“Subduing My Squirrels” – A technique to help you deal with overwhelm and worry

“I don’t have ducks.

I don’t have a row.

I have squirrels,

And they’re at a rave”

I’ve seen this gem of profound understanding floating around the internet in various forms over the past few years. Every time I see it (after I have chuckled anew because apparently I’m as easily entertained by the same joke as a baby playing a game of peek-a-boo), I reflect on how different and yet the same we are – us squirrel-minded people. Different in that we all have a unique collection of squirrels vying for space and attention in our heads, and the same in that we all just want the squirrels to CHILL OUT and let us have some peace and calm and maybe even a little sleep!

The good news is that there is hope for the squirrel-minded, for those of us whose thoughts and worries are so many and so demanding that we are easily overwhelmed and stressed-out. I see the squirrels in you and I know how badly you want to organize the chaos that often exists inside your mind.  I would like to share a technique with you that has helped me get my squirrels in a row (okay, multiple rows… but at least they’re orderly). This is a great way to take everything that is crashing around in your head, lay it out, and then deal with it in an easily manageable way.

Step 1 – Choose your preferred construction site

I prefer to use OneNote for all my note-taking and list-making adventures because it’s pretty fantastic and available across devices. If you choose to go with good old pen and paper though, use a different page or piece of paper for each heading. 

Step 2 – Build some squirrel pens

In other words, type or write out the following headings

• Things I need to do TODAY
• Things I need to do SOON
• Things I need to do LATER
• Things I feel GUILTY about not doing
• Things I have some CONTROL over
• Things I have NO CONTROL over
• Things I want to do MORE of
• Things I want to do LESS of

Step 3 – Pen each squirrel by calling it by name

Underneath each heading, type or write out everything you can think of that fits below it.  This takes all of the thoughts flying around in your head and makes them tangible because you’ve said precisely what they are and in a sense, pinned them down.  Very importantly though, leave the first one – “Things I need to do TODAY” for last. Here are some explanations and examples (which may or may not be fictional) for each heading:

Things I need to do SOON

These are the things you need to get done that feel very pressing in terms of urgency and priority. It’s very important here that you break down a big thing into smaller, more bite-sized chunks e.g.

• Clean house before dust bunnies become sentient and claim it as their kingdom
  • Evict said dust bunnies from floors
  • Reclaim countertops and others surfaces from said dust bunnies
• Get business newsletter done so boss knows I still work there

Things I need to do LATER

These are the things you need to get done at some point in the future, but not within the next month or so, which you are nonetheless reminding yourself of constantly e.g.

• Complete and submit intimidating application form which looks like it’s for the position of CEO of a corporate giant vs actually for my child to go to high school
• Declutter every storage space in house except man-drawer in kitchen (because a certain man’s trash and treasure are indistinguishable and live inside there together)

Things I feel GUILTY about not doing

These are things that keep nagging at you because you feel like you should be doing them but just don’t get around to them. Once you have identified them you can answer the following three questions to see where to go from there:

1. Is this important to me?
2. So what’s really stopping me?
3. What’s the way forward?

e.g. Write helpful and inspiring articles

1. Is this important to me?

Yes – Helps me sort through my thoughts and may be just what someone else needs to read

2. So what’s really stopping me?

Not starting – Finding anything else to do instead, because I’m not going to be able to put my thoughts “perfectly” into words (they are a bunch of squirrels after all and in my defence, pretty difficult to pin down)

3. What’s the way forward?

Remember the words of Harry S. Truman – “Imperfect action is better than perfect inaction” and just START, then go with the flow and have some fun.

Things I have some CONTROL over

These are the things you are worried about which you may not have complete control over, but which you can influence by taking some form of action e.g.

• Exam worry – Plan studying, then just stick to the plan for each day  
• Worry about possible work-from-home weight gain – Wear jeans once a week instead of tights or sweatpants and adjust diet and exercise according to fit

You can only do what you can do. After you’ve taken action for the day and the related worry starts getting restless and commences jumping around in your mind again – remind yourself that you’ve already dealt with it and there is nothing more you can do for that day. You may have to do this a good many times, but the squirrels slowly start to get the idea and you’ll have a lot more peace and calm if you persevere.

Things I have NO CONTROL over

These are things you are worried about, over which you have absolutely zero control e.g.

• End of world seems imminent (although I expected more zombies / aliens / giant spiders)
• What if… (insert a DIY dark and depressing thought here)

As with the things you have some control over, you can only do what you can do. The truth is that what you can do when you have no control over something you’re worried about, is to decide what you are going to do with that knowledge. You can decide to hold on to the worry, as if having it crushing your soul will somehow make it less likely to come true, or you can acknowledge it and then decide to embrace life in the moment despite that worry – after all, the only moment you really have is this one.

Things I want to do MORE of

These are things that make you feel good. They can be big or small and they don’t have to make sense to anyone else but you, they just have to make your heart lighter when you do them e.g.

• Sing along to favourite songs (On a side note – isn’t it amazing how your brain labels any and all song lyrics as super important, yet the reason you went into a room is labelled as irrelevant and often not even put in the recycle bin to be fished out?)
• Spend some time outside every day enjoying peace and tranquillity (Depending on the day, this can create a lot of peace and tranquillity for anyone left inside)

Things I want to do LESS of

These are things that make you feel decidedly not good. The important thing to note here is that they might be things that feel good in the moment, but that you realise are not good for you in terms of consequences or effects on yourself / others e.g.

• Aimlessly scroll through Facebook to avoid doing something (like getting out of bed)
• Aimlessly watch YouTube to avoid doing something (like starting a writing project)
• Aimlessly read news articles because of a fear of missing out on something important (and also because the dust bunnies are waiting)
• Procrastinate (see above)

Things I need to do TODAY

Now we can go back to the top of the list which I asked you to leave until last – these are the things you want to commit to doing today. Pick just one or two of the most urgent things or smaller chunks of things on the “things I need to do soon” list and move them to this list.

Step 4 – Pens, squirrels… ACTION!

In the famous words of Jedi Master Yoda – “Do or do not. There is no try”.  Decide to do the one or two things you have moved to the “things I need to do today” list and just DO them.

You’ll get at least those one or two things off your plate and out of your mind, but you might find that something even more amazing than that happens… Once you get going, you start to think: “Wow, that newsletter actually went really quickly and it was the only thing on my list for today. But the dust that typing and using my mouse kicked up is quite spectacular… I may as well get that sorted out too.” And then my friend, you become like an unstoppable avalanche of anti-procrastination which started with one tiny little snowball.

It is important to add here that no matter whether you reach snowball or avalanche momentum for a given day, make some time to do at least one thing from your “things I want to do more of” list and be mindful of your “things I want to do less of” list – this will help you start to prioritise things that make you feel good over things that might make you feel good in the short-term, but which are ultimately bad for you or just procrastination fuel.

Step 5 – Revisit, re-pen and repeatedly take action each day

Check-in with your squirrels each day and make sure they’re in the correct pens, especially moving some to the “things I need to do today” pen. Also ensure that any new squirrels which have popped up and are threatening to start a riot are quickly allocated a place in one of the pens.

Why is this technique so effective?

• It’s a great way to take stock of and organise your thoughts in a meaningful way and on a continuous basis.
• It gives your thoughts a place to be outside of your head so that you can separate yourself from them to some degree by making a choice about them or being more mindful of them.
• It helps you get things done without that terrible, crushing feeling of overwhelm that a traditionally long to-do list gives you.
• It helps you focus on getting things done in a slow and steady way instead of a frantic, haphazard way after you’ve spent far too long agonising and procrastinating.
• It takes into account the fact that you are not just a productivity-machine but a human being who needs to practice balance in your life and kindness towards yourself.

That said, I hope you’ll give this technique a try so that you too can subdue your squirrels and enjoy a less chaotic headspace. Here’s to chill squirrels, ticked boxes and lots of room for the things that make you smile.

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